I’ve had to attend traffic school so many times that I should have earned a degree by now. The reason being that my foot gets very heavy when I drive. I signal, I don’t weave in and out of traffic, and I don’t tail-gate. But, the foot is heavy.
Last Thanksgiving, The Watterson Expressway was empty of traffic. I was speeding. The limit is 55mph, but if you live in Louisville, you know that NOBODY does 55 on the Watterson. Everyone does 65mph. This means, if you are driving at 55mph, you are an obstacle that the other cars must avoid and get around.
I was doing 75mph, maybe 80mph. An officer pulled me over. I handed him my license and registration.
I said, “I know I was speeding, but I’m late to dinner with my family.”
He said, “I clocked you doing 15 miles over.” This was a friendly lie on his part. He had to clock me doing at least 75, which is 20 miles over, and it’s much more likely I was doing 80. (I didn’t see anyone around, so I was enjoying the nice vroom my Honda makes.)
But, my theory is that some cops here actually take into account the fact that the popular speed limit on the Watterson is 65mph even though the posted speed limit is 55.
Back to my conversation with the officer.
He said, “There’s not much traffic out here today.” Was he testing my will power? It seemed as though he must be.
I almost bit my tongue completely off trying not to say something smart-assed to this cop who seemed likely to give me a break if I didn’t screw it up. But, it was so hard not to respond to that statement with something along these lines, “You’re right, sir. There’s not much traffic on the road. That’s why I was able to go so fast. Nothing to hinder me!”
I don’t know how I mustered the strength to resist that temptation, and yet somehow I did.
I avoided a ticket by keeping my mouth shut. But, keeping my mouth shut can take a lot out of me, and that day was exhausting.