Monthly archives: June, 2004

You Can Do Better, Girlfriend

We’ve all been there. You’re in a relationship and you sense the other party has lost interest. In order to save face and avoid wasting any more time on something that is going nowhere, you break it off first. Maybe you say, “Ha ha. Beat you to the punch,” or maybe you’re far more mature …

The Princess and the Booger

My phobias are mind games that I can enjoy playing all by myself, just like solitaire. As I grow older I find I prefer these sorts of head games to the kind that more actively involve other people. This wasn’t always the case. My exes would all be happy to attest that I used to …

My Kind of Town

The plaintive, mournful cry of an animal becomes clearer as you approach the Holiday Inn. Could it be a coyote? A wolf? A bear? No. It would seem not. For as you tread closer still to the source, you begin to discern some distinct syllables mixed in with the howls and screeches. “I waaanna go …