A bored housewife jousts at windmills, pokes fun at everything from leg wax to Miss Manners.
When I had long hair, it always took curls well, but it never kept curls well. It would be beautiful for an hour or until I tried to do anything with it, and then the curls would all fall out. My mom had an interesting phrase she liked to use when she’d catch me primping …
I was baptized Catholic soon after my mom brought my tiny diapered butt home from the hospital, but I was destined to become a heathen. How could I become anything else when what I always wanted more than anything was to find god? I’m happy to say I finally did. I found my very own …
I’m not physically sick. Just sick of hearing myself think. I’ll be back when I’m no longer feeling existential. Don’t worry. It’s probably nothing some chocolate ice cream and a chick flick won’t fix.
You won’t see this ad if you watch the Super Bowl today. Why? Because CBS is all about censorship. Please join the One Minute Boycott. This is America, people. We don’t have to let them trample on free speech. Join me in saying to CBS, “I’m mad as hell, and I’m not gonna take it.”
You – Hey, Debbie. Me – Hey. You – How will you be an embarassment to your daughter in her teenage years? Me – There are lots of ways, but first and foremost will be that I still listen to AC/DC. You – Really? Me – They only know three chords, but boy do they …