Monthly archives: January, 2005

Through a Contact Lens Darkly

My memories of the time when I used to wear contact lenses are a little blurry. It’s been a long time. It was well before the days of throw-away lenses. The kind I had required daily maintenance. Cleaning. Dropping on the dirty floor. Finding. Cleaning. You know, maintenance. I’d have to soak the lenses in …

Sonnet to a Spammer*

Oh, spammer most vile Ye sicken me to my very heart and maketh me want to puketh wretched bile and pierceth thine intestines with a poisoned dart. What harmful thing befell ye, nasty sot to maketh ye such a twisted fuck? I careth not – for ye deserveth to rot and have thine eyes eaten …