She Needs Both of Her Hands Free to Scratch Her Butt

My daughter is going through that phase where she wants to pretend to be completely independent. The most humiliating thing she can imagine happening to her is for me to kiss her in public.

Charlotte would like for all of her friends to think that she was raised by wolves or possibly cloned. It’s just not cool to have parents who love you. Parents are for losers.

On the other hand, she does seem to need me to drive her places and to hold things for her. I am oftentimes reduced to acting as a coat rack, all the while trying to be as inconspicuous as possible while I’m standing there holding all of her junk. God forbid, I should draw too much attention to myself! What would the other kids think?!

So, I decided today that the ideal nanny for my daughter would be a wolf with a driver’s license and a built-in luggage rack on his back. Does anyone know a good candidate for this job? Biters welcome.

Comments 5

  • Oooohhh… I remember those days… Then again, that was payback for my mother dragging me around doing the shopping and telling me she only had me so I could carry things for her. I was affectionately known as “the donkey”.

  • maybe it’s just a reaction to the cable still being out 🙂

  • The only thing worse would be if one of her friends actually liked you. Ever notice how a conspicuous coat rack just ruins the decor?

  • Oh god. I remember being that evil teenage person. I was equipped with an energetic and hideously enthusiastic American mother, and all my friends had relatively uninteresting, laid back Australian mothers. I think I spent about two years of my teenage life crouched below window level in my parents car so no one could see who I was related to!

  • Funny how the teenagers work. My kids forget I am around but their friends run up to my car screaming “Mrs. Aithne!”. Even from across the parking lot. I tend to think they will get worse before it gets better.

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