What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of the Bahamas? Sandy beaches, perhaps? Lovely ocean views?
How about rabies? Yes, rabies. What about hepatitis A or hepatitis B? Did malaria jump immediately into your consciousness when I mentioned the Caribbean?
No?! Well, you may need to sit down. I have some bad news.
My family is planning a cruise. Eight days in the Caribbean. It sounded lovely to me. Truly wonderful.
Then I saw the CDC website. Uh, the grossness level on that site is extreme. According to the CDC, the whole world is a festering disease-ridden ball of fecal matter, and if you accidentally touch any part of it, you need to go wash your fucking hands – NOW.
Although the site doesn’t list any required vaccines for our trip, the recommended vaccines, particularly the ones for rabies, rather disturbed me. I mean, we won’t be straying too far from the ship on any of our excursions, which should be a comfort, but what if there are rabid beasts waiting for us at the docks? I say “beasts” ’cause I don’t know exactly what kinda critters they got there. Just that I ain’t pettin’ ’em.
Believe it or not, my husband, Mister OCD himself, is less worried about this than I am. When I suggested that we all get Hepatitis A and B vaccines, he mocked me with, “I’ll tell you what, instead of doing that, let’s just not have any unprotected sex with strangers while we’re there.”
Haha, Smarty Pants. But, what if after I get bitten by the rabid creature on the dock, they rush me to a hospital where someone with hepatitis B sneezes into my rabies wound? Who’ll be laughing then? Nobody – that’s who.
Anyway, as a result of my new found beinggrossedoutness, I determined that the CDC should have gotten a more accurate URL. I thought EW.com would do nicely, but that seems to belong to Entertainment Weekly and they may well deserve it just as much.