My letter to Quentin Tarantino:
Dear Mr. Tarantino,
After seeing your latest masterpiece, Kill Bill, I want desperately to throw some sweet lovin’ your way, because you just f*King rock. Nevermind the fact that I don’t find you physically attractive. I don’t even care. (Wait…Could we keep the lights off?)
Other directors should be made to kneel down and show some respect whenever they are lucky enough to find themselves in the same room as you. You are their leader. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Kill Bill was the best movie I’ve seen in months. It gave me a wonderful expectant sort of feeling throughout, and it never let me down.
I must confess that, before we saw the movie, Michael and I misconstrued your motives. We thought when you decided to turn Kill Bill into two movies instead of just one, as was originally planned, that your audience was going to get short-changed while you raked it in. We couldn’t have been more wrong. The fact of the matter is, we probably owe you more money than what we paid for our tickets.
Did I mention how much you rock? Good. Thank you for continuing to make excellent movies even though others continue to lower the bar by re-making the same stuff over and over again.
Yours in deep admiration,
P.S. – Please tell Uma Thurman for me that she rocks too. She must have worked her ass off preparing for her role in this flick. Let her know her hard work didn’t go unnoticed.