I’m Not Just Some Sex Object

I’m lightly toasted right now. Just like an almond… er, an almond drenched in vodka. I bring you an urgent message. Ha ha. I almost typed “urgent massage” just then, which is something entirely different. Write your own jokes about that if you’d like. I was so sexy tonight in my lunch lady outfit that …

Recyclo Babble

Just got a letter from Rumpke, which clearly states that they will no longer be picking up our recycling on Thursday and that they will begin picking it up on Wednesday, effective Oct. 29th. This is a bit confusing to me, since they have always picked up our recycling on Monday.

More Mysterious Than Stone Henge

Have you ever met even one person who is happy with his/her driver’s license photo? I’ll assume your answer is “No.” But, feel free to correct me if I’m wrong on this one. Some of you may have heard stories about the woman who got a good picture taken at the DMV, and then, on …

Pumpkin Bread*

You will need two loaf pans for this recipe. Ingredients: Dry: 2 2/3 cups all purpose flour 3 cups sugar 2 tsp.s baking soda 1½ tsp.s salt 2 tsp.s cinnamon 2 tsp.s nutmeg 1½ tsp.s allspice 1 tsp. cloves Wet: 4 eggs 1 (16 oz.) can pumpkin (A 15 oz. can is fine if you …

Lunch Lady

I’ve decided what to be for Halloween. I’m going to be the lunch lady. My costume will go perfectly with Michael’s bio-hazard suit, since most of the food served in a school cafeteria is dangerous to consume.

Elsewhere

1. My hubby has a sick sense of humor. 2. Wil Wheaton writes a letter to That Guy who is also known as “that poor bastard who caught the ball at the Cubs game.”